26 May 2008

food for thought

Yesterday was about sunshine, tramping, exploring, and friends. In the evening I watched the procession and saw the flowers laid out for the celebration of the eucharist. My plastic outdoor table, elegantly draped and decorated, was used as an altar at the "station" by our fountain. Now I am both an onlooker and a participant, my contribution being to community rather than religious ritual. (photos later I hope)

Zacchi and I went for a long long walk in the evening, returning after 9pm. Zacchi had left-over soup with his dry dog food, I had fish fingers from the freezer because I was too lazy to cook and hadn't been shopping for fresh food.

I have had some interesting emails recently. In one exchange we were talking about people walking in the shadow of others, seemingly invisible, diminishing if they are in shadow too long. In such relationships, is it the responsibility of the one in the shadow to move out of the shadow and seek a little sunshine, keeping in mind that most plants need a little sunshine to grow? Should the larger-than-life partner sometimes step aside, and let that sunlight in? Or does it come down to personality types, and recognising which one is more accommodating?

Another email talked about my blog, expressing a preference for the personal rather than the more global entries. This confirms something I have felt all along, that we relate to things on the smaller, personal level, and change comes from here. "In this world is darkness, so we must shine, you in your small corner, and I in mine".

Sometimes I think my blog is my own "visibility" in a life where I am a student, not a star player. As a student, I am learning that simple is best, ego causes problems, and the worship of money causes even greater problems. When just occasionally I think I would like to be visible, to be a part of the show, not necessarily the star because I enjoy supporting roles most, I do need to go back to nature and just sit, and be at peace with the wonderful world I live in.

Yesterday, as I sat on top of the fortified cave and crevice that made an observation post, I was almost glad that I hadn't been shopping, had not bought prosciutto and cheese, had forgotten to put in the apples. Sunshine, water, dry bread from a wood-fired oven, and delicious dark chocolate, simple yet the very best; this morning I woke up feeling rested, refreshed, and young again.

No comments: